Over the last eight years, I have assisted individuals in navigating the complexities and extremities of human experience, and more often than not, this has included a relationship with food that could or outright does fall under the category of disordered or dysfunctional. However, training and experience (both clinical and more widely) have repeatedly shown me that these challenges rarely, if ever, revolve solely around food or weight. Rather, they frequently arise from more deeper-seated psychological and emotional struggles, many of which can be traced back to our formative life experiences.
A cornerstone of my therapeutic framework is the concept of Early Maladaptive Schemas (EMS) or working models for how we see the world as shaped by our earliest life experiences (or attachments, as these tend to be quite deep relationships). These internal working models shape how we perceive, experience, and navigate the world and future relationships. Often operating below the surface of conscious awareness as we age, these working models/schemas profoundly influence how we perceive ourselves, interact with others, and interpret the world around us.
Based on my clinical observations, certain internal working models/EMS appear with greater frequency among individuals struggling with eating disorders:
Defectiveness/Shame: An internalised (this theme persists) working model/schema or understanding of how things supposedly are that manifests as a pervasive self-belief in one's inherent flaws or unworthiness, often leading to food control as a means of self-punishment or a desperate attempt to seek validation from others.
Emotional Deprivation: Individuals grappling with this schema often experience a profound sense of unmet need, leading them to turn to food for solace or a sense of control.
Failure: An idea so ingrained around the concept of inadequacy leading to an unrelenting pursuit of perfection, particularly regarding body image and weight as a thing seen as being separate from the self and used as a means of "status".
Unrelenting Standards: This internal critic imposes an unrelenting demand for unattainable perfection, perpetuating a vicious cycle of restrictive eating and excessive exercise.
Abandonment/Instability: A specific belief unsupported or abandoned by others can make food a source of comfort during periods of emotional distress.
Social Isolation/Alienation: Feelings of disconnection from others or the world at large can be exacerbated by societal pressures and idealised standards of physical appearance.
Insufficient Self-Control: Many individuals experience difficulties in effectively regulating their emotions, which can contribute to episodes of emotional eating and bingeing.
Recognising that these working models (or schemas) are not solely a product of genetic predisposition is essential. Their development arises from a complex interplay of various factors, including:
Family Dynamics: Growing up within a family environment dynamic characterised by unhealthy eating habits or critical attitudes towards body image OR morality that can significantly influence an individual's relationship with food.
Early Childhood Experiences: Traumatic events, neglect, or emotional unavailability from caregivers can have lasting and profound effects on the development of these schemas.
Societal and Cultural Influences: Relentless pressure exerted by the media and current societal norms often promotes unattainable ideals of physical appearance linked to status, further contributing to the development and entrenchment of these challenges.
In my therapeutic practice, I integrate psychodynamic principles with evidence-based techniques derived from Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and other established approaches. This integrative framework allows us to collaborate effectively towards:
Identifying and Challenging Core Beliefs: Assessing and then finding ways to challenge the underlying core negative beliefs which fueled disordered/dysfunctional relationships.
Developing Emotional Awareness: Focusing on a deeper, more meaningful understanding of emotional experiences builds the skill of readily recognising, understanding, and effectively managing emotions and our responses to them.
Exploring and Addressing Unmet Emotional Needs: By identifying what is sub/unconsciously bothering you, we find strategies for managing and dispensing with that emotional baggage.
Cultivating Self-Compassion: By encouraging a shift from self-critique towards acceptance, we help mend the relationship with "the self" by making it more mutually understanding and receptive.
Developing Healthy Coping Strategies: My aim is to help equip you with practical and effective methods for managing stress, anxiety, and emotional triggers.
If you are grappling with an eating disorder, remember that you are not alone. I and many, many others can understand the difficulties you face and be there to provide a safe and supportive space for you to explore your experiences. You can journey to recovery and healing, one step at a time.
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